Cold Medicine Inspires Brilliant Ideas

by Rasmenia Comment Closed
It never fails. If I have nothing to do, no one to see and nowhere to be, I feel great. If I have plenty of things that I have to do, places to go and a busy social calendar, my nose will turn into a snot faucet. My throat will become sore and I will cough up mucous in an endless stream in between violent sneezes.I was sick at my wedding. The last time I went back to Colorado to visit friends and family during Thanksgiving, I had a horribly contagious cold.It never, ever fails.Now that the Hotel Massoud (a.k.a our home) is booked solid from September 7th to September 22nd, I'm all hopped up on cold medicine and have sneezed so much that the cat has made herself scarce, refusing to be in the same room with me.I think Olivier is enjoying this, though. I can barely speak, which means that I cannot effectively piss and moan about anything,...
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The “Fuck It” Method for Fleeing the Country

by Rasmenia Comment Closed
Just in case any of you have ever thought that you might like to flee the country & live elsewhere, I've decided to share with you my own, patented 10-point system to make it happen.1. Stop dating. Dates are horrible rituals that feel more like an audition, anyway. Fuck that - start dating online. The best way is to find someone in another country so that you don't have to go out to dinner or movies or any of that shit with them.2. After about a year of emails, phone calls & trips overseas, begin the process of inundating yourself with a bunch of bullshit paperwork & red tape to bring your foreigner to the United States.3. Decide, "fuck that" when it becomes too much work. Discover that it's easier for an American to go to another country than it is for a foreigner to come to the states. Remind yourself that the more distance between you & Bush, the...
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