There & Back Again, Part 4 – Bathrooms, Burritos & Beheadings

There & Back Again, Part 4 – Bathrooms, Burritos & Beheadings

by Rasmenia Comment Closed
So, there we were, a frozen December night in Tulsa, with our faces pressed against the cold, dirty glass, staring at our empty bus.  The Greyhound station was small.  The movies had gotten worse - instead of Billy Bob Thornton, we were now trying to avoid looking at the screen as an estrogen-soaked Lifetime movie cackled in the background.Olivier & I went outside while I shivered & cursed.  The Greyhound employee inside had informed us that we would be stranded until 3:30am, when the next bus for Amarillo, TX was due to arrive.  If we could get a seat on that bus.  We tried to come up with some sort of plan to get ourselves out of Tulsa.  What we came up with was... jack shit.We went back inside & ran into the kid with the Hari Krishna hair.  "I saw a bar down the street," he said.  "I really like beer.  I make my own brews at home."Olivier &...
Read More
There & Back Again, Part 3 – Screw Me in St. Louis

There & Back Again, Part 3 – Screw Me in St. Louis

by Rasmenia Comment Closed
When Olivier & I arrived at the Greyhound station in Erie, PA, we were giddy.  It was 3pm on Saturday, the day after Christmas.  We'd had a big pile of Arby's earlier that day, so I had gotten my fix after craving their delicious, cheddary slop for the past 2 years.  We were leaving behind the stress of a Festivus gone bad & were looking forward to a week at home in Colorado.We had our bus tickets, 200 lbs. of luggage & a box of chocolate donuts.  We were ready to voyage across the country for the next day & a half.  We would have to change buses several times, but still... it was only a day & a half.A day & a half.  No sweat.The first thing that we figured out was that there was no dicking around when it was time to board the bus.  If you're traveling with someone, it's next to impossible to find 2 seats...
Read More
There & Back Again, Part 2 – Prickly Lodgings

There & Back Again, Part 2 – Prickly Lodgings

by Rasmenia Comment Closed
"Next to a circus there ain't nothing that packs up and tears out faster than the Christmas spirit."  -Kin Hubbard"Family love is messy, clinging, and of an annoying and repetitive pattern, like bad wallpaper." -Friedrich Nietzsche . I truly believe that tragedy can bring out the best in people... & that the holidays can bring out the worst.  Humans are fucked up like that.  In spite of everyone's best intentions, sometimes holiday gatherings get tense or chaotic.  No matter how hard you try, you may still end up feeling as though you've stepped out of reality & into one of those ridiculous Christmas movies where everything goes wrong.We arrived at our destination in rural PA a day late.  We got to see a few relatives - some that I had not seen in several years & that Olivier had never met.  We had a great time - in spite of my occasional fits of choking on mucous & bleeding from the...
Read More

Big City Dip Shit Games Vol. 3

by Rasmenia Comment Closed
Just in case you've missed the first 2 weeks of class:Big City Dip Shit Games Vol. 1 Big City Dip Shit Games Vol. 21. Go bus seat wrestling. This is a good way to pass the time on any city bus as you make your way to your destination.Just stand in the bus and wait for some poor sucker to walk over to an empty seat and place your body between the person and the seat. If they seem to be ignoring you, they're most likely faking. That's just how the game is played. Give them a little nudge to let them know: game on!To make this more fun, start jabbering nonsensical sentence fragments at your opponent in a foreign language. When you see the expression of helpless confusion on their face, give them a good shove.2. Sell black market cigarettes. All you have to do is buy cheap cigarettes in another country, smuggle them across the border and then stand...
Read More