My Clock Can Wait for Uncontrolled Pooping

There comes a time in a marriage when people will begin asking about your plans to start breeding.  That time generally falls somewhere between saying "I do" & cutting the cake.Once they've started asking, they won't stop.  "So, when are you going to start having kids?"  Their eyes are blinking rapidly, focused on you, waiting for an answer.What is the correct response to this one?  Do I tell them when we'll be having our next sexy fun time?  Do I present a chart with my ovulation cycle?  For fuck's sake...I'm still in my wedding dress.There's only one thing to do - drink heavily throughout the duration of the reception.Damn.  Only one problem.  It doesn't stop after the reception."But your clock is ticking, you know."  Now, that's tact.  I'm 35.  My clock isn't a major concern for me right now.  I should punch you in the spine.Is that what marriage is?  Get the piece of paper & start pushing out larvae...
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