That Shiny Newfangled Technology Can’t Do the Work for You

That Shiny Newfangled Technology Can’t Do the Work for You

The venue reeks of cheap coffee. Creaks and groans of tables and chairs dragging on the hardwood floor echo, bouncing off the high ceiling. Barely audible beneath it all is the mumbling of socially awkward writers mingling in the early morning.The chipped folding tables are covered with cloths. Stacks of books and displays are propped up, tip over, then propped up again. Chatter and laughter rise in volume proportional to the increasing number of bodies.A quiet little man with a single stack of books stands next to his wife, who looks at no one and speaks to no one. He shows me his book. Shows me photos of himself with his book. Tells me how impressed people are with his work. And so on.This guy, my neighbor for the day, nods toward my carefully laid-out display of books. My short story trilogy, finally complete.“How long did these take you to write?”The way he asks this, it feels like a trick...
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Please Don’t Sit Next to Me

Please Don’t Sit Next to Me

A few months ago, I was hanging alone with a sandwich while watching Atypical on Netflix. In the season 2 episode, "A Nice, Neutral Smell," the main character, Sam, who is autistic, attends his sister's track meet. Standing in the bleachers, a girl in front of him turns her head back and forth, her ponytail whipping Sam in the face. After he's smacked a few times, Sam seizes the ponytail and doesn't let go until his father intervenes.Sure, this happens because of Sam's autism. He doesn't have the same concept of social norms that neurotypicals do. The thing is, when I watched this scene, I nearly spat sandwich all over my living room because I was cheering. More than once in my life, I've wanted to do exactly what Sam did.Sitting next to strangers in public can be stressful. Some instances are mentally and emotionally taxing, detracting from the experience of whatever it is you're trying to do. Maybe it's...
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Sinners, Marriage & Mockery

“I'd rather laugh with the sinners than cry with the saints Sinners are much more fun...” -Billy Joel ◊ So there was this woman that was living in sin – yeah, you know what that means – the avoidance of matrimony, holy or otherwise, and she had the nerve to live under the same roof with a man. “I don’t know if he’s the one," she said.“I’m not ready for that,” she said.Of course the parents that she was stuck with – the ones that she never saw – didn’t approve of this one bit.“It goes against the Bible," they said.“We don’t know what to tell our friends," they said.Well, this woman just went on living her life because she knew that trying to please them was a waste of time and would only create misery for herself. She was selfish like that.She cared even less about their Bible or their friends. She was an asshole like that.“You should really think about marriage,” her stepmother...
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